Author Topic: Giant Schnauzers have taught me...  (Read 3407 times)

Offline hugo~monster

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Giant Schnauzers have taught me...
« on: November 30, 2005, 12:26:39 am »
this is a little skit me and a fellow giant owning friend put together.  it is what giants have taught us-all true stuff...

Giants Schnauzers have taught me . . .
 
That DVDs don’t need the box or the plastic case,

They have taught me that “holey drawers” can still be worn and holey socks too; I may have to take up the long lost art of “darning” socks.
 
They have taught me,
That I should never attempt to walk across the floor by myself-I could fall and get hurt and not have a big dog to land on.
 
They have taught me that toy poodles CAN “live” and “thrive” on the couch only.
 
That rolling in the mud is fun- just let yourself go (I'm still trying to get the hang of it though).
 
Never share your food unless you can steal someone else's even it is worse than what your eating-it's the fun of it!
 
That window glass can vibrate from a dog's bark and so can my head.
 
That chair seats don't need corners-no more banging your shins on that thing! And splinters aren't near as painful and don't leave a bruise...
 
That Giant toenails can hold 2.7 pounds of mud underneath and make 10 lbs of clay dust when dry.  This is great when you’re tired of that sparkling clean look and have nothing better to do.
 
That you can wear chewed shoes in Wal-mart & no one will notice- who looks at your feet anyway?
 
Those fingernails are only good, if you use them to scratch giant backs.
 
That you don't need to see the T.V. to enjoy a good program...and how to watch a show between cropped giant ears.
 
That gas is a laughing matter, or you would cry.
 
Those portable phones still work after they have been chewed on, called Thailand and dunked in the water bowl.
 
That cells phones are so small these days they can be concealed in the mouth while giving you that “what did you lose mom? Look”.
 
That keys with keypad for your car must be kept higher than 6 feet off the floor or you will go out and find your car with all the doors unlocked, and the trunk up, and the radio on & the battery nearly dead. And I still don't know how they got that radio station to come in- I can't.
 
That you can never drink too much water and never pass up the opportunity to put a wet beard on someone's bare leg.
 
That company's crotches are nice places for giant noses.   
 
That I can “sit on the throne” while a giant’s head is in my lap.
 
Chasing cars is great exercise for the body AND the lungs....
“STOPPPP! HALT!! OFFFF! COMEBACK”!
*pant, pant* (that’s me not the dogs),
“STOP! STAY! STAY! SIT! DOWN! ANYTHING! PLEASE”!!!
 
That I should answer the door with a firm hand on the choke collar and God forbid I might have to "sign" for anything.

Any size lap is NEVER too small for even the largest of giants and insists upon pulling, pushing, twisting, nudging, cuddling, wriggling, poking, and digging in till every inch is sitting securely on me.

So you see my Giant has educated me very well and I wouldn’t have it any other way…
~SHELLIE & HUGO~

MommyOfSchnauzers

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Re: Giant Schnauzers have taught me...
« Reply #1 on: November 30, 2005, 12:31:00 am »
Dazy is just a pup, but I am being educated.  ;)

Offline DixieSugarBear

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Re: Giant Schnauzers have taught me...
« Reply #2 on: November 30, 2005, 09:53:36 am »
LOL
Lisa, owned by the following:
Sugar Bear - Great Pyrenees 4.5 yr.
Dixie Darlin - Great Pyrenees 4 yr.
Penny Lane - Great Pyrenees 2.5 yr.
Beauman - Great Pyrenees 14 months
Izzy - Great Pyrenees 14 month
Rosie - Great Pyrenees (at the bridge)

Offline Scootergirl

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Re: Giant Schnauzers have taught me...
« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2005, 11:50:04 am »
I think all of those apply to ANY large breed dog! Good Job!!
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principle difference between dog and man." -- Mark Twain